But What?!

But What?!

Author’s Note: I wrote this poem before I got saved and it summed up the cry of my heart and the burning question uppermost on my mind at the time. It represented my call to God for answers. My later Poem, “Answer to My Call” was written as a response.

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Etching out a lonely existence
Searching for some purpose,
Some meaning, 
To all this misery.

Believing in a God
Whose existence sometimes seems
As plain as the Sun in the sky
And yet, at times, 
As ephemeral as the early morning mist.

A God who sometimes seem 
As close as one’s own skin
And at other times, as far away
As a distant star in the horizon.

Trying to plan ahead
But can’t see straight,
Because the pain clouds the mind
And blots out reason.

Looking for a lifelong commitment
From every female that is met
A romantic failure for reasons yet to be acknowledged
Adding to the burning confusion and misery
That eats away at the sanity
Slowly deteriorating the hold on reality.

There must be a reason to all this madness.
Something ordered, Something structured
Must be taking place here…..

But what??!!

Everest John Alexander
Copyright ©1981 Everest John Alexander

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